Cialis

Commercials are often so lame their entertaining. A case in point are the TV ads for Cialis.

My wife, my son and I were watching the first day of football wild card playoffs. During one of the commercial breaks, the station ran an advert for Cialis. Of course, this sent my son and I off the rails with our usual gaggle of suspect comments.


We agreed, Cialis, for daily use, probably worked as advertised and would keep you locked and loaded for action, while waiting for one of those magical moments.

But these commercials are just silly. In a typical opening scene, the big guy, who, by implication, hasn't had sex for a long time, is fondling vegetables in the super market, while a woman, his wife I suppose, is standing next to him. He studies the veggies, and while paying close attention to a cucumber, gets a goofy look on his face, turns to the woman, takes her hand, and gently squeezes it; this obviously means, the special moment has struck. The woman smiles, her eyes go all bed roomy, and you can tell she's ready willing and lusty. And now the commercial gets ridiculous with all the symbolism of, beach's, forests, rock piles, you know, those romantic places, just made for sex? There are different scenes where they're sitting around on the beach, or mossy rocks, or in the middle of a wheat field, staring into each others eyes all moody and suggestive. They'll get to the sex part eventually, but we won't see it. The final act cuts to side by side bath tubs with the big guy in one and the woman with bed room eyes in the other, and there holding hands. Not even together in the same tub?

Come-on man! Bath tubes? What the hell kind of symbolism is that? Are the white tubs symbolic of post-coital cigarettes, WTF?

When the urge, consumes my two heads, I'm sure as hell not going to shuck my clothes and crawl in to a cold cast iron bath tub floating in the surf. Of course, the copy writers, might think cuddling up in a couple of side by side bath tubs, holding hands, is some kind of new age romanticism. Or, because the couples are at least middle age, and the writers, mostly young, think this is how there parents had sex.

Any way we were rattling along having a good chauvinistic time picking the add apart, when my wife pipes up and wants to know, "They have these adds for Cialis and Viraga, for men, where are the adds for women's sex products?"

Well shit, she could have taken that question off the table. We had to figure out what she wanted to know. Was this an example of a double standard, were women's possible sexual dysfunctions a taboo subject, or was there no market worth going after with expensive TV advertising?

She didn't wait long enough for me to answer, before continuing. "Women." She said, "Don't need TV adds. Any woman knows that if she has a problem, she can talk it over with her doctor. And if she needs a pill or something she'll get a prescription. No big deal." That seemed clear cut enough from the woman's perspective but she was still curious. Why all the adds for men's ED pills?

"Well," I started explaining." Men need to have their self awareness tweaked from time to time. And the state of their erections, or lack thereof, makes them nervous and squirmy when the subject comes up. Calling the condition erectile dysfunction, makes it worse, that seems such a pejorative medical term, indicating weakness, and when shortened to ED, brings to mind other embarrassing conditions, like clap or gonorrhea, you know the dreaded STD's." Her eyes started to glaze over, and she waived her hand dismissively, "Yes, yes you guys are so sensitive, spare me the touchy feely lecture. But why do I have to set through all these commercials about the little purple pill?"

"Blue" I said, "Viagra is blue and Cialis is yellow or something. And the ads are mostly psychological coercion. Pharmaceutical companies know men won't go to their doctors for a prescription if they're embarrassed or think they have a shameful condition. So the commercials are always upbeat with positive results. And, you'll notice, the women in these ads always seem to be receptive and eager. Kind of a school girl adventure for them. So, over time, after watching many TV spots dealing with ED, men convince themselves that only good can come from taking the pill. They prepare a dumb speech of some kind and go to their doctor."

My rambling explanation got us through the commercials and back to the game. I don't think my reasoning completely convinced my wife. Although, my son thought it sounded about right. Of course there was still the matter of all the disclaimers, loss of hearing, maybe blindness. And your doctor has to check you over and confirm that you're hart is sound enough for sex. What if he tells you not to have sex because of a weak hart? Oh well, I thought my wife had endured enough of my bull shit for one day, and I concentrated on the game again. But come-on man, bath tubes?